The last 10 questions to help you review your life (part 3 of a 3 part series)

Welcome to the final instalment in this three part series.  I hope you've enjoyed thinking over the questions from your own unique perspective so far  and that you've been finding them constructive.​ Now for my last 10.  

1. Are you stuck in the same old pattern doing the same old thing?  Are you so caught up in keeping up that life is passing you by and you don’t even know what you want anymore?  When you have no time for you, it’s time to make time!  Slow down, step off the treadmill that your life has become for a moment, breath and think.  What am I doing this for? How am I investing my life? Where is it taking me? Where is my joy?  If the joy is nowhere to be found, do you really want to continue doing the same thing in the same way to get the same result?  If you’ve been doing it for a long time you might struggle at first to remember or discover where to find joy.  This is one of the areas where Therapy can help you find your way back to the life you’re meant to live.
2. Do you notice the magical moments?  It’s always interesting to notice the memories that stand out;  often it’s the little things, the dappled sunlight coming through the leaves as we lay under a tree on a summers day, the sound of a child laughing, the goofy antics of a favourite pet, the tears of laughter as a friend recounts a funny incident.  These are the Joy credits that fill our life bank and sustain us through tougher times.  Try to be fully present for them.
3. Are you a perfectionist?   Having high standards is wonderful, demanding absolute perfection is self-sabotage.  Perfectionism is a crippling block to progress.  Life rewards output and completion.  Aim to do your best to get things done and follow through.  If you find yourself paralysed by the fear of “never being good enough” Hypnotherapy will help you create new thinking patterns that will help you break through that barrier to your success.
4. Do you take the easy way out?   If you stay within your comfort zone, life will most likely feel unsatisfying.  Something innate within us drives us to grow and evolve.  Stretch yourself to the limit of your potential, but don’t be surprised if, given the variety that exists in life, you find that your potential is as infinite as the Universe.
5. Do you put a brave face on and pretend to be ok when you’re not?  Sometimes life is hard and it’s ok to have some down time.   We need to process our emotions not suppress them; as the word process implies there is movement not stagnation. It’s about working through things not ruminating.   Set your boundaries, once they’re in place it becomes easier to be true to yourself.  If you feel sad work through it, if you feel angry work through it.  Good boundaries will deflect attempts by others to negate your emotions, project theirs feelings onto you or tell you what you should be feeling or thinking. Only you know and you don’t have to live up to anyone else’s expectations in this regard. It’s ok to be human and all emotions are valid.
6. Do you blame others for your problems?   Taking responsibility for our lives is liberating.  Others around us may behave badly, however in most cases we’re in control of how we respond.  There is no prime real estate in victim-hood, it’s a neighbourhood best traversed quickly.  Sometimes we need help and support to escape from particularly toxic people, don’t be ashamed to seek that help.  Once free don’t give toxic people power by dwelling on their actions or enabling them.  The extent to which you can live your best life depends on the extent to which you’re prepared to be own your life.
7. Are you a people pleaser?  Trying to please everyone will drain you.  Be the best you that you can be, be kind, be respectful and expect no less in return.   Sometimes you’ll be unpopular for being true to yourself, however you’ll be ok.   The right people will respond positively to you.
8. Are you a worrier?  Studies have shown that only 8% of our worries have a legitimate basis.  92% of the time worry is our mind playing tricks on us allowing an anxious trigger to morph into a pseudo mind-fact.   Worry doesn’t change anything except your  state of mind.  If you’re not going to be worried about it in a year’s time, why worry about it now?  If you’re concerned about something, work out what you can do about it and if possible take action, if not practice acceptance, with acceptance comes peace of mind.
9. Do you think more about what you don’t want than about what you do want?  Invest your energy into what you want.  Life tends to follow where your focus goes.  Being positive puts you in a far more resourceful state than being pessimistic.  Positive does not mean dewy eyed and unrealistic, it simply means you are solution focused rather than problem focused. 
10. Are you Grateful?  Remembering to be grateful for the good things in our lives, however small is empowering.  It fires up the reward centres of our brains increasing our sense of happiness and wellbeing.  It doesn’t matter if we’ve decided to acknowledge gratitude for a thirst quenching glass of water of a financial windfall, the brain will produce dopamine and practicing gratitude regularly will increase your determination, attention, enthusiasm and energy. 

So this brings me to the end of this 3 part series.  I hope it’s allowed you pause to think  and review where you are in life now, and to come up with some questions of your own to gain deeper insight  into the direction you’d like to take your life in.
I’ve found it invaluable in recent years to take some time to assess my life, check my progress towards existing goals, ensure that they are still the best option for me and  to come up with some new dreams and aspirations.  It’s an aspect of mindful living that’s continuing to lead me towards living a fuller richer and more authentic life.   
*If you’d like some help in getting back in touch with your true self,  therapy will help.   As a trained and accredited Counsellor and Hypnotherapist committed to ongoing professional development, I can use the latest Psychotherapy, NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming) and Hypnotherapy techniques to help you get on track to live your best life.   I’m located in Mentone, South East Melbourne, call 0435 923 817 or use this contact form to arrange your appointment. 

​* Results may vary